Perhaps the greatest human tragedy, the one tragedy that feeds all others, is hatred. It is remarkable to see how long people hold on to their hatred. Of course it comes in various forms like resentment, anger, and that which underlies all anger, hurt—usually hurt feelings. In spite of the effort to heal or move past hatred, many prefer to hold on to the negative feelings year after year.
Take a moment to reflect upon the people you have known through your life. Likely you have seen this sad human tragedy of hatred many times even in your personal life. Why is it that people prefer to hold on to the hatred? Why is it that they prefer to continue to assault the other party one way or another throughout time? Is it some sort of pride or identity with what is deemed principle? Is it just a physiological state of emotional collapse into an irretrievable state of wounding? The damage that is, has been, and continues to be done as a result is a great scourge upon humanity. Not only are friendships destroyed and cities divided, but even wars are fought as a result. Harmony and good will is replaced with tension and cruelty. It is like a heavy, dark, relentless cloud that hangs over families, communities, and nations.
And how are such things healed? No matter how many people with heartfelt sincerity request healing, it seems that once the collapse into hatred occurs, the hater will not, cannot, let it go. It almost seems that attempts to heal only inflame the hatred. People sometimes prefer to leave and take their emotionally collapsed state of hatred with them, only to inflict it again wherever they may go. It is as if they insist that the emotional collapse does not exist within themselves but it is those they hate that are the only problem.
What can one do when at the receiving end of such hatred? It seems that walking away and avoiding the hater only enrages the hater further. It is as if they insist upon you being there to provide them a target upon which to unleash their scorn.
What can one do if they are in fact the hater? Can they find it within themselves to acknowledge their state? Can they bring themselves to deal with their inner state and heal it?
As I write this, I think of many people throughout my life who would no doubt think I am referring to them. Perhaps I have thought of them while writing this and perhaps I have not. But the point here reaches far beyond one individual or another. I am referring here to the treacherous shadow cast upon all people as a result of the cloud of hatred unhealed and seemingly perpetual.
If the stress and strain within people would be released, the hatred would go away with it. To let it go is doable, but not all that easy to accomplish in this world. The technology exists to release those stresses and strains. My life has been dedicated to offering that technology to humanity. But it is a tough sell. The arrows of hatred, anger and resentment continue to fly. At times, it is all one can do to continue standing and keep moving forward. One feels the hatred can no longer be stomached for another moment. When will the time come when this scourge upon humanity leaves us? Sometimes the Dylan song comes to my mind and it feels the answer is “blowin’ in the wind”. Yet all we can do is face the wind and continue moving forward, forward, always forward.
In time, the world will live in peace. Harmony will prevail.
It is incredible how deep seeded it is within our physiologies and how difficult to truly let go of. For me the understanding of karma, meditation and counciling Have been very helpful.
Thanks to you, for your knowledge and commitment has made it possible.
From what I have seen, hate comes from having been hurt so deeply, it feels like it threatened your sense of Self and ability to move forward. This is a great question from this Michael Mamas blog: “Is it just a physiological state of emotional collapse into an irretrievable state of wounding?”
It is so true that it is hard for haters to move on. It almost seems too threatening to do so.
Thank you for the powerful, important words.
I thought the sentence “It is as if they insist that the emotional collapse does not exist within themselves but it is those they hate that are the only problem.” was particularly insightful. It encourages one to reflect on our own responsibility in creating the situation in which we feel hateful. This technique has helped me considerably in bringing resolution to bad situations/relationships.
I think this is a good but difficult topic to address. I found the idea of identity or pride mixed into the anger, making it sticky, very insightful.
Forgiveness doesn’t mean I have to forget what the other person did. It doesn’t mean I have to like it. I simply have to be willing to let go of the emotional charge.
You’ve definitely laid out how dire the problem is…
Kept reading, hoping for a solution.
Is this a hint?
If the stress and strain within people would be released, the hatred would go away with it. To let it go is doable, but not all that easy to accomplish in this world. The technology exists to release those stresses and strains. My life has been dedicated to offering that technology to humanity. But it is a tough sell.
Please, more on the technology!
I will do as you request soon. Likely with a http://www.drmichaelmamas.com blog.
I started this school with a lot of anger, mainly stemming from my childhood. Interestingly enough I didn’t even realize I was carrying so much anger until it was pointed out by you. Through meditation, counseling and the work you do with your students, I have moved forward instead of being caught in the past.
And what if the object of hate and the hater are one individual? What then? An exhausting way to live.
This blog resonated very deeply with me looking at both sides of the coin. I really appreciated that you didn’t bottom line it with a prescribed solution. The open-ended questions felt like an invitation for exploration and reflection and put me in touch with a very deep place inside that seemed beyond any of the roles of the “aggressor” or “victim”. Honestly, I felt like something was liberated and healed on a very deep level. The words are failing me here and I know the process of exploration will still continue, but for now I just like to thank you for putting out the knowledge in such an artful way. Just incredible…
So profound, so timely! Thank you!
I find it useful to dig around under the anger to the pain, because pain, to me, for whatever reason, seems a little easier to move, a little less stuck or stagnant, than anger. When pain moves, it is pretty easy for me to tell, too, because there is a physical and energetic shift that happens with it.