Like all children learning to play a musical instrument, my daughter gets frustrated when she has to play the scales. At such times, with frustration, she decides she doesn’t want to play piano anymore.
Playing piano is an art. It is learned through practice. Even if you are enlightened, it doesn’t mean you are a good pianist. It requires practice.
Perhaps the most challenging art in all of life is dealing with people. It takes practice. Frustration is part of that process. Like children with music, adults often feel inclined to give up on learning the art of dealing with people. They would prefer to live in a bubble, isolated from the world. This is just like the ostrich burying his head in the sand. The ostrich may think that makes him safe, but in truth, it makes the ostrich more susceptible to danger.
The simple truth is that life is all about people. Your ability to deal with people directly affects the degree to which you are successful in life. Success in this regard is measured on all levels: personal fulfillment, financial success, happiness, the list goes on. The sooner you accept that and dedicate yourself to cultivating the art of dealing with people, the better off you will be. As with playing the scales, you will become frustrated. You will hit the wrong note many times, but practice makes perfect.
I offer many tools to assist you in the process. It takes time to learn those tools, but learning them is just the beginning. You must practice their application over and over again. You are not just learning to play a musical instrument here. You are embarking upon the greatest challenge of life, second only to the attainment of enlightenment.
I would say that one of the biggest gifts I have received from the Mount Soma Ashram is learning about people. You would think all the training and practice in counseling would do it, but the ashram takes it to a new level.
I really do feel a similarity between interacting well with people and playing a musical instrument well. They both require full attention, paying attention to the subtle, feeling your way, and in addition, are an expression of the heart. Thank you Brahmarshi for your gift of the Mount Soma Ashram.
We had a staff meeting this morning and afterwards I sat down and read this blog. For almost 14 yrs,I have been learning how to deal with people. The dynamic of having 35 to 40 employees has been quite fascinating however add in 100’s of clients also and my world would sometimes get turned upside down. I have definitely improved on my technique simply from years in the business however the most significant growth has come in the last few years. I contribute that to my meditation and some seriously powerful surya classes.
O by the way Brahmarshi..Thank you for that too!
I have dealt with people all my professional life and find it easier than dealing with people on a personal level. There is a code or unspoken set of rules in business which has made my working with people in that capacity easier than on nonbusiness interactions. Working with the school had helped me tremendously on the personal level.
Living in an isolated community until I was 18 has helped to make my personal dealing with people very difficult. Since taking Brahmarshi’s classes and hours of meditations, I finally am seeing some growth in my ability to interact with people.
Thank you
Great, very good point….dealing with people, business people, friends, family goes on and on.
Then add family members that are sick…we have had a range of cancer issues with friends and family. Fortunately us. What a range of emotion. We have a 35 yr old diagnosis with incurable cancer…Doc gave her 2 weeks…she has already gone past that and refuses to accept his death sentence….YEAH! My dad, age 93, is struggling. Love them and their going forward…what a range. What an experience with both. Meditation is my only rest, especially right now. Clears my mind to help them both with love and support….thank you Brahmarshi!
Barbara, Michael, and Lori,
Your comments are all beautiful. In my years, I have seen the best and worst of people. Yet I always look to the best… strive for the best… hope for the best… do my best to inspire the best. I am sometimes disappointed… sometimes hurt… but I will never stop. When I look at another, I see the best. All else is nothing other than dust on the surface of the diamond. I leave it to you to decide if that is my strength or my weakness.
Judi,
Step back… There is a picture bigger than most can see. As you said, you touch into it in meditation. Though it may not always be easy to do so… look to it. Like the still depth of the ocean, it holds everything in the perspective of silent understanding. The waves of emotion will churn and the full range of emotions will be felt, but do not lose your Self… do not lose your connection to the calm waters of the depth of your being… your under-standing… of the big picture. There you will find the peace and beauty underlying all that is.
Love it. Thank you.
Lovely, thank you Brahmarshi. Two of your fav tools/lessons of mine (tho you’ve changed the wording) that I practice frequently with family, friends and people I meet:
“There are multiple, simultaneous, contradictory, yet equally valid perspectives.”
The Divine Currents, helps me “be easily” with pepople and myself and less judgmental ESP in self-perceived challenging situations.
Perception, it’s everything, where I am with my “relationship with”.
Jai Shiva Sankara
Ok. Once again, I can’t resist. This is in no way intended to detract from the message of the blog. It is simply the first thing that came to mind upon reading the analogy. I draw from one of the greatest works of literature ever writ, although the dialog is a screenplay adaptation:
The Tragedy of Hamlet, Prince of Denmark
Act III Scene II
Hamlet
Will you play upon this pipe?
Guildenstern
I cannot my Lord.
Hamlet
I do beseech you. Come. It is as easy as lying.
Guildenstern
I have not the skill.
Hamlet
Why, look you now, how unworthy a thing you make of me! You would play upon me; you would pluck out the heart of my mystery; sound me from my lowest note to the top of my compass; God’s blood, do you think I am easier to be played on than a pipe?
The lesson? Perhaps truth, no matter how bitter, shocking, or harsh, is better than trying to “play” someone. I think we tend to tip toe around honesty in the avoidance of ruffled feathers in this world of political correctness. Anything less than complete transparency is manipulative. If truth is a slap in the face or a shock to the system, then so be it…
HAM-let…The O.G. HAM…Now I’m hungry…
Jai Guru Dev
Geoff,
Yes. The art lies in bringing the truth forth in a manner that can be heard… in a manner that it will be received.
In the Ashram when we were working on projects, Brahmarshi stress to us it is not about the task it is about the people. When I kept that in mind it made all the difference in my interactions with people.
Jai Guru Dev
Yes Crystal!
And needless to say, the task too is more readily completed.
Dearest Brahmarshi,
I apologize in advance. I cannot help but speak my mind. The art of life is to be courageous. I don’t know how one is supposed to present facts and truths in any other way than laying them out on the table. If people are not ready to hear it or receive it, then that is their karma. Perhaps they will be more receptive the next time around. I don’t think we have time to cater to people who would rather bury their heads in the ground like an ostrich. They will eventually come around, once the initial shock wears off. People are far more resilient and capable than it seems they are being given credit for. The rationalization that people “can’t handle the truth” has been used to justify lies and deceit for a very long time. I choose to deal with people of courage. People who are willing to ponder, reflect, and question their reality. People who are not afraid of where their quest for knowledge takes them. Just as people come and go within the group, it simply can’t be helped that some inevitably hit a road block in their spiritual development. As you have stated many times, people attend a lecture and recognize they have found truth, and swear they will never miss another class, only to never be heard from again. Forward, forward, always forward right? I believe the people are ready. The coherence of our group, along with others both in the world and behind the scenes, can support and comfort during the transition. The solar system has already moved into the new age. Why then would we not bring forth the drastic change that the world so desperately needs? Every day that goes by is an injustice that should not be suffered by the innocent people on this planet. The reality of what happens on a day to day basis is agonizing. Even if many are confused and afraid by what is revealed, it is better than the alternative status quo. We need to shine the light of awareness on what has been going on for God knows how long. The truth will set us free. Please, I beg you…
Jai Guru Dev
Jai Shiva Shankara
Reflecting daily on your writing has helped me in connecting with others at a new level. I have started to see the difference. Thanks Brahmarshi.
Geoff,
As Emerson said, “”Who you are speaks so loudly I can’t hear what you’re saying.” Class in SF is coming up soon. I will see you there and address your questions. However, the tone of your words carries more meaning than the literal words. You say you want to hear the truth. But your words make a statement more loudly than they ask a question. Statements are declarations. Questions are only questions when they are asked free of preconception and charge. Preconception is usually more an emotional state than an intellectual perspective. I look forward to seeing you in SF. Come with your questions ready to hold them up to the light of the Sun.
Beautiful. Love this: “You are embarking upon the greatest challenge of life, second only to the attainment of enlightenment.”
Still thinking about “the Art of life…interacting with people.” (I’m a little sideways with the word “dealing”…kind of feels burdensome…but that’s me.)
I don’t want to sound disingenuous, toss out flattery or slip into transference, but I have never seen or ever imagined observing anyone exhibit this Art, a truly higher Art form, like the way you have demonstrated.
My aunt/godmother had a “gift with people” as they say but she would humbly bow and take lessons from you. In her own words she might have said, “That Mr Brahmarishi simply takes the cake! You’d better listen to that man, Bill.”
Above, you said “I always look to the best…” and many years ago you said something like “I always see the divine in people…I can’t help it.”
I’ve seen a lot of people who are “good with people” or have skills in “dealing” with people…but I have only observed and known one that has truly, deeply, turned that into a rarefied art form.
Thank you…….thank you.
P.S. Like your Emerson quote and fond of this one:
….Till thou at length art free,
Leaving thine outgrown shell by life’s unresting sea!
(Chambered Nautilus)
This blog still on my mind… Thinking it should be a permanent Blog theme or thread somehow.