by Michael Mamas | Friday, March 4, 2016 | Relationship |
I just posted a new article on LinkedIn titled “How to Expedite Negotiations”. Comments on the article itself are welcome. The article begins:
"Negotiations generally involve multiple people telephone conferencing or sitting around the table. Remarkably, even at the highest levels, personalities count more than anything, even more than facts and rationality. By managing personalities and artfully integrating them with facts and logic, you become the most valuable person at the table…"
Read more.
© Michael Mamas. All rights reserved.
by Michael Mamas | Sunday, February 14, 2016 | Relationship, Spirituality |
View the SlideShare slideshow.
Happy Valentine’s Day!
© Michael Mamas. All rights reserved.
by Michael Mamas | Sunday, February 7, 2016 | Mount Soma, Relationship |
A number of times yesterday and today, I have been asked to write something about the Super Bowl. I thought to tell you about all the silly and fun pregame antics we have enjoyed among ourselves here at Mount Soma throughout the playoffs through today, but it seemed to not be enough to say or very easy to convey either. It all just naturally built upon itself as a bunch of hilarious back and forth emails and frivolities.
There was just an interview with the Broncos quarterback Peyton Manning that was personally quite moving for me. It is likely his last game before retirement. He said what was most important to him was to earn the respect of his teammates and coaches. That is certainly one of the most important things in life. You can’t expect to gain respect from all the people who do not really know you, but to earn the respect of those that are close to you, those who see and work with you on a regular basis is a most laudable life goal. I can honestly say that I have deep respect for all of the people with whom I have the honor to be around here at Mount Soma and work with closely and I know they feel the same. For that I am most grateful.
Enjoy the Super Bowl! If you do not like football, there are always the commercials and halftime show!!
© Michael Mamas. All rights reserved.
by Michael Mamas | Saturday, December 12, 2015 | Announcements, Relationship, Social Media |
I’m honored that entrepreneur.com just published my article, “5 Steps to Master the Art of Negotiation“. The article is already reaching thousands of viewers!
You are encouraged to help spread the word by sharing my social media posts about the article. The links below take you directly to my posts. It is best to use the below links instead of sharing from the article itself.
© Michael Mamas. All rights reserved.
by Michael Mamas | Wednesday, November 25, 2015 | Announcements, Relationship |
Elephant Journal just published my fourth article. This one is about important skills needed in business and life. Your help in sharing this article is very much appreciated!
© Michael Mamas. All rights reserved.
by Michael Mamas | Saturday, August 8, 2015 | Relationship |
I was asked to talk about respectful arguing. To start with, I must say that the phrase is a bit of an oxymoron. Isn’t there something inherently disrespectful about arguing? To have differences and to talk them out is one thing. To argue is quite another. To do so is to not only disrespect the other person, but also to disrespect yourself. How to deal with that is your decision. Personally, if someone will not speak respectfully, I choose to not speak with them at all. That carries a stronger message than reducing myself to the level of arguing. Now in some situations you may well have to make some important points. You cannot just let it go. However, if you think about it, arguing does not happen until AFTER your points are made. Feeling the need then, to argue the point goes back to disrespect. Disrespect for yourself, thinking you have not been valued, or disrespect for the other person, thinking they would not in their quiet moments give some thought to your perspective. More often than not, you are heard and honored far more than you know.
Also, once you have made your point, if the other person is not willing to sit and discuss the matter with you thoughtfully, it is a waste of time and may even be detrimental. Through arguing, people dig in their heels, paint themselves into a corner, and as a result find it even more difficult to be open to your perspective. Down deep, everyone knows that you do not win an argument by silencing the other person. You need to know that the other person really does know that. It is your job to, as best you can, stay centered in your own being, your own dignity and integrity. And rest assured they will see and respect that, even if in the moment, they were hoping to defeat you.
How do you respect another? And how do you respect yourself? By coming to rest in your own being. There you find wisdom. There you find understanding. There you come to see the dignity that lies deep within all people, regardless of how they may currently be behaving. To see that is to respect them. It certainly does not mandate giving up your own dignity by meeting them on their current behavior level, if it is not a respectful level.
Remember to give people the time and space they require. Understand that they as well as you will go out of balance at times. That is alright. But when you catch that happening, STOP. Find another proper time and space to revisit the discussion. This gives both of you the opportunity to reflect. If you agree with a person or not, you need to understand them… to understand their perspective. In so doing, you open the door to evolving not only their perspective, but also yours. Do not sell yourself or the other person short. Also remember that no one ever wins an argument. You both win by turning the matter into a reflective and respectful discussion.
Now all this must be held in the context of your own personality. How you employ these principles is something you have to find within your own self, your own mastery.
How did Bruce Lee put it? The art of fighting without fighting. Or we could say the art of arguing without arguing.
© Michael Mamas. All rights reserved.
by Michael Mamas | Sunday, June 21, 2015 | Relationship |
If a father knows his son is with him on the feeling level, that is what is most important to the father. If the father feels the son is pushing him away, it is very painful and the father will want to pull the son in closer, control the son, all the more. The issue between father and son is not so much on the surface of what it being done day to day… it is on the deeper feeling level. The father also wants to feel that the family is close, that the kids are close and supportive, and love one another.
If it feels to the father that the kids are drifting apart, it will be painful for the father and he will try to rearrange the surface to bring them closer together, just as the father will rearrange the surface to bring the son closer to his dad and the family, if he feels the son drifting away emotionally. If the son speaks to the father from the place of love and understanding for father and shows that, through not just words, but even more importantly, tone of voice, all will be well between them. The father will feel safe in affording the son more freedom on the surface of life.
Due to emotional issues between most every father and son, this is not so easy for the son to do. Also, when the father holds power such as money or flat out verbal aggression over the son, or when the father historically does not ‘hear’ the son, it is not so easy to do.
However, if it is done, it will be heard and is the most effective way for the son to gain autonomy. It also shows the maturation of the relationship between father and son. Many people may mature extremely well in all areas of life with the one exception of their relationship with father. Yet, it is actually easy to do if the son can maintain this simple open-hearted approach… Few sons overcome their childhood issues with the father. Few even acknowledge the issues. Yet, to do so is the mark of a great man. When accomplished, the relationship of a father and son as adults is exquisite, beautiful, deep, and fulfilling for both.
© Michael Mamas. All rights reserved.
by Michael Mamas | Monday, June 15, 2015 | Personal Growth, Relationship, Spirituality |
Feelings are everything. Thoughts matter little. How you feel about those thoughts make all the difference. If you feel a thought is not true, it is rejected. Feel it is true, and it is embraced. Even seemingly irrefutable thoughts are, in fact, considered facts because we feel that way about them. For example, ‘two plus two equals four’ is embraced because it just feels so right. Without getting overly technical or philosophical about this, one considers thoughts to be true based upon how one feels about them.
The uniting of our thoughts with our feelings is called ‘reasoning.’ The art of reasoning, wisely and accurately, is called ‘discernment.’ Logic is rooted in discernment is rooted in feelings. Feelings are everything.
There are two types of feelings:
1) Feelings in harmony with Nature, with Natural Law.
2) Feelings rooted, not in the laws of Nature, but in conditioning, limitation, indoctrination, dogma, programming, distortions, or what Maharishi Patanjali called ‘samskaras.’ This is to say your issues, sometimes called ‘your stuff.’
Of course, most feelings are a mix of the two. Your world view is a result of such feelings. It is important to understand that these two types of feelings essentially feel the same. Even how you feel about the feeling you have is the result of these two types of feelings. In other words, you judge yourself, others, and all thoughts and emotions based upon some combination of these two types of feelings. For example, you may feel that your anger is a bad feeling not in harmony with Nature. You may feel that happiness is in harmony with Nature. But it is not that simple. The full range of human emotions can be either in harmony with Nature or not.
It is very difficult then, to know the true nature of what you are feeling. You usually consider how you feel about something to be ‘your truth.’ But is it? Is it really? As you evolve, ‘your truth’ becomes more and more in harmony with Nature. Yet it is viewed by others based upon their issues, their world view. You can justify anything with the intellect… and people do. Your thoughts (your intellect) rally around your feelings to justify them.
But it gets even more complicated than that. World views are floating around everywhere you look. You become indoctrinated by them. The thoughts, based upon whichever type of feeling, begin to indoctrinate and program you. As that happens, you believe them. You feel they are correct. You consider them to be ‘truth.’ You become convinced that the world view is ‘truth.’ You even feel and become passionate about a particular viewpoint. Lives are dedicated to such a viewpoint. ‘Education’ then, is considered greater indoctrination into that viewpoint.
So, discovering what is true is not so easy to do. But one thing is for sure, Truth dwells within you. By filtering out your indoctrinations, you find harmony with Nature (Truth) within yourself. After all, you are one with Nature. You are the Unified Field. You are one with God, though today, more and more people are taking issue with the word ‘God.’
Everything I teach is for one purpose… for you to find harmony with Nature within yourself. More than likely, that does not look like what your indoctrination has convinced you it looks like. But I am not here to tell you what that looks like. I am not here to tell you what to think. I am here to help you learn to think for yourself… not your indoctrinated self, but your True Self. Your Self that is one with the source of all life and existence… infinitely wise, intelligent, creative, harmonious and divine. Proper meditation and cultivation of the art of discernment compose that gateway.
Consider the understanding of what is written here to be an invitation to walk through that gateway. Yet it is up to you to do so. The Self is revealed to the Self, by the Self, and through the Self.
Below is a related post, with video, on Facebook.
© Michael Mamas. All rights reserved.
by Michael Mamas | Saturday, June 6, 2015 | Personal Growth, Relationship, World View |
A number of business people have consulted with me over the years. After speaking with a few of them, I decided to jot down some notes of the main points that come up often. I sent them to two of those people who deal with multi-million dollar deals on a regular basis. Their feedback was extremely positive: ‘I couldn’t agree more.’ – ‘Great stuff!’ – ‘I have employed those principles in every major business negotiation I have ever been involved in.’
I have not seen these principles offered in MBA programs, which tend to stick with the cold hard numbers aspect (see The Theory of Induced Blindness blog). The numbers are the easy part. They are not the art of business. I am sharing these notes with you in the same raw form I shared them with those two people.
Working Notes for MBA 101: The Essential Knowledge Not Taught in MBA Programs
- steady hand on the rudder
- its all about people
- read my last blog… theory of induced blindness
- trust issues… honey, not vinegar
- win/win is the only way to go
- same side of fence and we all win… be a player not a pain
- there is a rhythm to everything… don’t push it
- don’t shoot yourself in the foot
- business is an art… the art of people… the math must be known, but the key is the art
- get on board (or be left behind)
- fact: this all applies from a Kool-Aide stand to multi-billionaire deals
© Michael Mamas. All rights reserved.
by Michael Mamas | Sunday, May 10, 2015 | Personal Growth, Relationship |
One need look no further than to a mother holding her child to know that this is not a man’s world at all. This world is held by the Mother. It is Mother Divine that holds our world together, holds our universe, holds our hearts.
Sri Vidya, Knowledge of the Mother, is known to be the highest knowledge. The Mother is the upholder of dharma. She holds us all in her heart. She understands us all. She stands-under, upholds, all of life and the entire family dynamic of humanity. It is her love and understanding that holds us all with tenderness.
On this day, we celebrate in gratitude to our mothers.
© Michael Mamas. All rights reserved.
